Purpose-Driven Parenting Part 3

In the past three weeks, I have been exploring ‘Purpose-driven parenting'. While this is such a broad topic, today’s edition will be concluding this series. Hopefully, we can revisit the subject in the future.

Now, for young parents out there, the concept of purpose-driven parenting might seem daunting. While it is not a challenge-free route to travel, be reassured, it provides opportunities for cohesiveness, bonding, trust, mutual agreement, exploration, cooperation and more.

For a child to fully realise his/her potential, being clear of your purpose as a parent is one of the first hurdles that one has to overcome. Lack of clarity attracts complacency, but the clarity of vision facilitates planning and implementation.

Below are the things to put into consideration when planning to be a purpose-driven parent:

1. Resolve to nurture your family in a loving and caring environment.

2. Prayerfully select a great environment that aligns with your purpose as well as conducive to the development of your family (morally, ethically, and spiritually etc.).

3. Allocate regular family time. Today, family bonds are being eroded for several reasons. For instance, parents might perpetually allow their children to watch TV for peace of mind. The time spent away from our children will eventually add up. My suggestion is, don’t just allow your children to play games and watch TV all evening (after school), spend quality time with them as well. I remember when my children were growing up, they were only allowed to watch TV for a short time after school. For all of us, it was challenging to be firm on this rule, but with time everyone got used to it. With persistence, your children will soon understand and learn to cooperate with you. Also, ensure that you pray together. A family that prays together stays together.

4. Let effective communication be the bedrock of your home. Take time to talk to your children. No matter how young or big they are, they might have pressing issues to discuss. It might be issues like, 'my friend did not invite me to his/her party.' It sounds trivial, but for that child, it’s a big issue. If parents don’t develop the habit of taking time to talk to their child, somebody else will. I remember, when my children were young, I used to block time slots with each of them separately, to talk or carry out activities that they enjoyed. Doing activities with them is another way of getting to know what is on their mind.

5. Every child needs their parents physically, emotionally and spiritually. Be prepared to sacrifice your time, energy etc. to ensure that your child reaches or even exceeds his/her potential.

6. Show that you care about your child by:
· Rewarding their efforts.
· Use affirmative words.
· Correct them in love when they are wrong – don’t overlook things, especially if it is a constant problem. Remember, overreacting does not help any matter. You can firmly make your point without aggression.
· Discipline your child when this is required – love must be the basis of your discipline. It is another broad area of parenting. I do recognise that discipline differs from one context or culture to another. For this reason, this point is beyond the scope of this current discussion.
· Instil morals

In conclusion, for best results, both parents should endeavour to be in unity. Your child can read you like a book, and they know when there is disunity. Disunity is a breeding ground for all sorts of negative behaviour.

Your child will grow up one day and become independent. So, make the most of today. Parents are co-constructing history with their children. What type of account are you writing?